You Can't Please Any of the People, Any of the Time (or so it Would Seem)

(originally posted May, 2006)

Okay… so yesterday I was reading my regular message board discussions, and what did I happen to come across but a thread called “Skinny Women Are Out of Style”.

*WHAT THE HELL?*

**RECORD SCRATCH**

Against my better judgment, I read it, and the young lady who authored the post wasn’t trippin, or angry towards her fluffier counterparts, but she actually felt like a second class citizen because in the dating world, it seems like the fat girls are (finally) getting the love that’s (long) overdue them.

*sigh* …Are you kidding me?

Nobody in this world is ever happy with anything. First the fat chicks can’t get dates because we’re fat. Light skinned folks can’t get dates cause they’re melanin deprived, short folks cause they’re vertically challenged, dark skinned folk are TOO black, l'il dick men are just left out on GP () and the list goes on and on and on. And now *DRUM ROLL: I’m supposed to feel bad because some skinny bitch missed a date on the strength of some cat peepin’ MY posterior??? BOO-HISS and BYE!

I wish this was the least of my problems *lips twisted*

However… on this particular subject (because it applies to directly to me and my ample ASSets), I have to admit that I’m scratching my head. When did big girls fall into fashion, exactly? While I might not have had a bunch of the relationships that I’ve wanted, I’ve NEVER found myself lacking for male attention/affection/companionship. Surely I wasn’t the one woman capable of drawing a love for fluff out of so many who somewhere along the line professed they’d never date a chick whose sizes were in the double digits. I won’t fall for the premise that I’m actually that amazing.

(Well, maybe I am, but then again I’m onto something here so I’ll get to the point)…

Could it be, maybe, that it’s not so much a matter of size, as a matter of having a little more going on the INSIDE, where it really counts? After all, there are a million beautiful women in this world who are size 8’s. And guess what: Somewhere there is a man tired of putting up with her SHIT! Furthermore, for all the people that overlook us because of a shortcoming THEY label us with, is that really the kind of person that we WANT in our lives? Think about it…

Then again, I’m thinking that in this post-modern, politically-ubercorrect society in which we live (if that’s not a joke I don’t know what is), we’re supposed tobe sensitive to the needs and feelings of others. Maybe it’s just that the barriers against fat acceptance are finally coming down, making it more comfortable for larger people to live happier and more fulfilled lives, and the people who enjoy having a larger companion are now freer to pursue what they really want without fear of ridicule.

On the real for real: Who gives a shit? How about grow up and just DO YOU? If we’re all miserable with each other isn’t there a shred of truth within that mayyyyyyyyybe we’re all just miserable with ourselves? I got a real novel idea… if we all learned to be happier with ourselves and radiate a TENTH of the inner light within, maybe, just maybe, this world would be a much kindler and gentler place.

The moral of the story for today, kiddies, is about mind over matter. Put your size (complexion, height or whatever issue is your Achilles heel) out of your mind, and it won’t matter. (or at least it’ll matter a little less)